sadness

i am sad. i do not want to sleep. i want to achieve something, no matter how small, but i lack energy. i must sleep in order to restore my energy, but i do not wish to sleep. i will not sleep until i am satisfied with achieving something, no matter how small. i will not sleep until i have used this day in a productive manner. but i will not do that because i am too sad. i'm not in the mood. i'll read wikipedia and watch the news. i'll be falling asleep eventually, against my will, and i'll wake up just as tired as i am now. and probably just as sad. but i can not extinguish this sadness alone. no. i am weak. no. i am contempt with being sad. i can afford being sad. i have too good a life. and then i die.